Rochester woman works to create memorial for stillborns in Dover

2022-05-21 22:11:34 By : Mr. Jonny yu

DOVER — Aubrey Lamontagne says she has been "very public," since the stillborn death of her son Jasper Lake Lamontagne "talking about my loss to anyone who will listen."

She said when a baby dies at birth, or in utero, people often don't know what to say or how to react. That often leaves parents at a loss of how to grieve.

Lamontagne's project, called Jasper's Heart, a memory garden at Pine Hill Cemetery in Dover, aims to change that. Lamontagne, a Rochester resident, wants to provide a place for parents and others to mourn, reflect and heal.

The Jasper's Heart project began when her son was stillborn Aug. 25, 2018. 

"I wanted to do something permanent," Lamontagne said. "I had Jasper cremated so there wasn't even a grave I could visit and sit with him. I think many parents face the same thing, so this is for anyone who needs it. I have been very public, talking about my loss to anyone who will listen. It helps me. Maybe the children's memory garden will help another parent find peace."

Lamontagne is now a member of the group Seacoast Families Coping with Perinatal Loss. She helped with the fundraising for a new bereavement cradle. She wants to create Jasper's Heart to honor the son she lost with a memorial and to help other parents facing similar heartbreak.

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The goal is for the garden to be dedicated later this summer on Aug. 25.

"We have worked with the cemetery and the city," said Lamontagne. "All required approvals are in place. We have about half the fundraising we need accomplished so far and are hoping for help to meet our target dedication date. We have had a lot of donations, some anonymous. I really want to see my vision happen, to make this peaceful place for all parents who need this. People do not talk about stillbirth, but it happens and maybe we all help each other honor and remember the babies. I see a peaceful place to reflect and maybe some of us can connect with each other and share our stories."

Elaine Case, founder of Bread of Life Thursday, a charitable program of St. John's United Methodist Church in Dover, is working with Lamontagne.

"The heart-shaped monument will be located at the cemetery in memory of Jasper who was born still and silent," Case said. "Aubrey decided to create this garden to help all those whose babies were 'still' born, but unable to go home to make memories."

Jasper’s Heart is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization, working to raise the $13,000 needed to complete the garden. The heart-shaped monument along with flower urns and benches are being hand carved by Vermont Stone Sculpting, located in Barrington.

"Donations are needed so that we are able to hold our dedication on Jasper’s fourth birth day," Case said. "Please visit the website to learn more and to help us reach our goal. All donations are tax deductible."

To learn more or to donate, visit jaspersheartnh.org.